Bring on the SITS Girls

March 6, 2012 by ·

We interrupt the previously scheduled suckage to report that today is my SITS day! Any non-bloggers who read this may not know what a SITS day is, so if you want to skip past this I won’t hold it against you. But since I know my mother will ask, I’ll provide this link to the SITS Girls about page that talks about their mission and what they do with featured bloggers.

So with that out of the way, welcome!

Blogging Resources for Women

Here’s the Coles notes version of this blog:

  • I started blogging in January 2011 as a way to deal with the lingering effects of postpartum depression.
  • I blogged about my worst day, how I fired my psychiatrist, and how I almost lost my marriage to postpartum rage.
  • I did a TEDx talk about it.
  • (If you want the whole year in review, you can get it in this short(ish) photo post.)
  • I got better eventually and, because life’s not challenging enough, decided it was time to make a change I’d long resisted and moved with my family to a new city 600 miles away from where I grew up (and where my parents still live).
  • At first it was awesome.
  • But right now it’s kind of hard.

I haven’t written much about all the stuff that’s going on, but I will, and hopefully soon. So stick around, will ya?

And just for fun – some random stuff about me:

So that’s me. It’s so nice to have you here – please help yourself to milk and cookies. (What? I have a 3-year-old.)

If you’d like to leave me a hostess gift, I’d love it if you’d leave a link in the comments to your most honest post. I love it when bloggers put themselves out there (I did a SITS guest post about it) and, frankly, I could use a little inspiration.

Thanks for coming by!

 

Filed Under: Happy things · Tagged With: , ,

Life List: The Next 15

November 10, 2011 by ·

I’ve mentioned my life list before, and I’ve posted about the things from my list I’ve completed. Since we’re moving in a couple of weeks (ack!) and I quit my job (whee!) I figure this is a good time to dust off the list and see what I might work on after we move. Here are 15 things, numbered according to their spots on the master list.

3. Volunteer again.

Since we’re going to be in a new city, it might be a good time to look at volunteering – even for a one-off event. Good way to meet people, and would also force me (and my complete lack of any sort of sense of direction) to find my way around.

6. Attend a TED talk.

I do want to attend one in person, but I just came across TEDxWomen, which is taking place on Dec. 1 in New York and LA. I really want to figure out how to attend, but if I can’t you can bet I’ll be watching the talks.

9. Get in the habit of taking more photographs.

I really need to rethink this one, because it’s difficult to define the point at which this is done. In any case, a new place is a good opportunity to take some more pictures. Plus I have a spanky new iPhone 4S. Instagram, baby!

19. Really learn how to use a graphics editing program.

I’ve been using Pixelmator and, frankly, it bugs me. Time to find an alternative and see if someone (I’m married to) might be willing to walk me through its use.

24. Write something and have it published in a magazine.

I actually did this already and forgot to post about it. I had a piece on postpartum depression published in a local parenting magazine in October, which was very exciting. But I’d love to do another, so I’m going to get some ideas going and work up the nerve to pitch something.

29. Learn how to make a cup of tea – properly.

Because we’re in for a real Canadian winter, and I’m going to need tea.

cup of tea and teapot

Image credit: YaZzZz on Flickr

30. Have another child.

We’ll see what we can do about that. :)

33. Act in a stage play again.

I totally want to do this, especially after a recent Twitter conversation. Maybe there’s someone who’d be willing to let me be a reindeer or a shepherd in a Christmas play…

44. Improve my 10K personal best.

I need to get running again. Even if I freeze my buns off doing it.

51. Get my personal email inbox to zero.

I almost got this done while we were away last week. (That’s the beauty of a long car trip and no wifi.) I’ve got the system set up but I need to finish it and then use it more consistently. I’m sick of losing emails.

52. Get some form of exercise every day for 30 days straight.

But don’t hold me to it.

54. Get a colourful streak in my hair.

I did this one already too, but I’m hoping to get the blue put back in before I go. (Stupid dye fades so damn fast.) I would like to see if there’s a way to get this done so I can keep it, though. Hair extensions, maybe? (Anyone know?)

55. Give blood 5 more times.

I’ve got one counted towards that five, but I need to go again.

58. Get a tattoo to commemorate beating PPD.

I’m planning to go with a friend, and he and I were hoping to do this before I move. Maybe we’ll do it, if I can get my act together. Aside from all the packing and stuff, I do need to commit to a design. I saw this one recently and I’m thinking of something like it:

bee-tattoo
Isn’t that cool? I don’t want the bee (wasp?) but a bird silhouette where the bee is and my words (whatever those are going to be) where the z’s are might be just the thing. Got any tattoo pics you like? I’ll add them to my Pinterest board. At this point all ideas are welcome.

59. Help someone else with their life list.

This is a relatively recent addition to the list, and I really like it. I need to find someone with a list that includes something I can do to help. (Have a list? Anything a humble Canadian girl can help you with? Link please!)

So there you have it: 15 more things I can do to embrace this change.

What are your short-term goals and dreams?

***

This is my entry in the Just Ask Bucket List Getaway Giveaway. Just Ask offers a breast and ovarian cancer screening and is encouraging people to share 15 things that I want to enjoy in my lifetime as a reminder to be aware of my health. Want to enter? Head over to TodaysMama.com to get the details. 

Filed Under: Happy things, Hello, Inspiration · Tagged With: , , ,

Welcome to My World

September 25, 2011 by ·

Funny things sometimes happen when you create a life list. Not just things like dyeing one’s hair blue, but things like having weird conversations with oneself trying to determine if something counts as having fulfilled something on one’s life list.

In this case, the debate centres around #56 on my list: Write a book and have it published.

I haven’t done that (yet) but I did do something related that I’m big-smile, dancing-for-joy excited about. I wrote a piece about motherhood that was accepted for a book, and on Friday that book was officially released on Amazon!

The cover for the Welcome to my World ebookSeriously, can I just revel in that for a minute? We were just about to have dinner on Friday when I saw the note from the editor, so I clicked on over and, oh mah lord, there’s my name in the contributor list. On Amazon!

Okay, I’m done revelling. For now.

In non-squeeing seriousness, this is really exciting for me. It’s exciting because I wrote something honest about an aspect of motherhood that was – is – hard for me. And it’s been published in a book along with stories (some funny, some serious, some both) from other writers sharing their perspectives on stay-at-home moms vs. working moms. Neither role is easy, and any mother will relate to the experiences shared in this collection.

I think sharing these experiences is important. There are those who dismiss “mommy bloggers” as…what? Fluffy? Inconsequential? I don’t even really get what the eye rolling is about because, in my experience, mommy bloggers are not a homogenous group and there are plenty making quite a difference in this world, thank you very much. (I could, and probably will, write a whole post about this…)

Anyway, I don’t even consider myself a mommy blogger, and that’s not actually what this book is about. This is a book about the choices we make as mothers – or the choices we’re forced to make, in some cases – and how those choices affect who we are. This topic digs deep into the core of women’s identities.

So yes, I’m proud to have my voice represented alongside the others who contributed to this book.

Welcome to My World is an ebook, and it won’t cost you much more than a fancy cup of coffee. I’d love it if you bought it and tell me what you think. You can get it on Amazon (for Kindle) or on Barnes & Noble for Nook.

If you don’t have an ereader you can download one free:

Kindle for PC
Kindle for Mac
Nook (various devices)

So there you have it. If I had “get published” on my life list I’d be checking it off. (Maybe I’ll add it just so I can do that…)

Huge thanks to the book’s editor, Sarah Bryden-Brown for including my piece, and to the book’s sponsor, Giggle (even though their stuff gives me serious baby fever).

(Whee, I’m published!)

Filed Under: Happy things, Motherhood, Writing · Tagged With: , ,

Walking the TEDx Talk

September 11, 2011 by ·

Yesterday I presented at a TEDx event – the locally-organized versions of the well-known TED conferences. I’d like to share that experience with you and have been trying to figure out how best to do that. I was inclined towards a humble description of how it went, as in:

It went really well. 

It was a great experience. 

It was fun, and I’m really glad to have done it. 

You know what? Screw it.

Instead I will tell you this: I got up in front of a theatre full of people I don’t know – people from my local community who I might very well see on the street tomorrow – and told my story about postpartum depression and how blogging, with brutal honesty, about my breakdown not only helped me but helps others. I shared some excerpts from my posts here. I cried – not a little, a lot.

Here’s how it went: I got a standing ovation. And I am really damn proud of that.

I wasn’t sure what to expect from the event and I certainly wasn’t sure about my place in it. I was honoured and totally excited to be asked to speak, and I was less nervous than you’d think about telling my story. What I did worry about was whether people would connect with it and whether I would be able to offer something for them to take away.

The organizers were supposed to give me time cues and they chose not to, so I went, er, slightly beyond my allotted six minutes. Judging by the response, the people – including men – in the audience who were crying, and the incredibly generous comments I got afterwards, I think I can safely say I managed to get my message across.

That’s not the only reason I’m proud of how it went. I’m proud because I did it in a way that was true to who I am. I knew I was going to cry – I couldn’t figure out any way around it. And I actually didn’t worry about it. My story, and my message that it’s okay to be a little bit vulnerable, it’s okay to remove our masks and be honest about our struggles, and that, in doing so, we might actually make the world a better place – that’s an intense sort of topic. You want people to be emotionally invested in what you’re asking them to do? Make them cry.

Making people cry wasn’t my goal, obviously. Making it okay for me to cry was my goal. Because that’s what happens when we open ourselves up to people and share the stories about the hard stuff and reveal that maybe – just maybe – we’re better off for having dealt with something difficult. We allow ourselves to be vulnerable. I was never okay with that before. I am SO okay with it now.

Those of us who put our words to these pages – who tell those hard stories and reveal our tears – know there’s beauty in the breakdown. We know we’re not alone. We know we will get support and that those who don’t support us perhaps just don’t understand.

I’ve seen this countless times on other blogs. My friends’ blogs. Your blogs. I’ve seen you share stories about hard things I never would have suspected had you not written about them. I’ve seen you be bravely, beautifully honest and then, just when I think all your cards are on the table, you lay down your hand and say, “This is what life dealt me. It’s not the hand I’d have chosen, but there’s no point hiding it so I’m going to play. I’m going to stay in the game and play, and if you care to read along with me I’ll share my strategy and you’ll see that you can win even when you get dealt a bad hand.”

That’s why I believe bringing together writing and technology is more than “blogging” and think those who dismiss what we do here underestimate the power of this art. This art has the power to break down barriers and borders. It has the power to make life better. It has the power to make lives better.

You know it, and I know it.

And I think it’s an idea worth spreading.

[Update: The video of my talk is now available.]


This is our very last week to make an impact for Be Enough Me 4 Cancer. Last week we had 45 people link up an enough-themed post in our Be Enough Me for Cancer campaign and I’d love it if you’d help us boost that number again. For every 20 linked up posts, Bellflower Books will provide a memory book to a woman fighting breast cancer through Crickett’s Answer for Cancer, and help bring a smile to courageous women giving it their all, every single day. The link-up remains open for three days. No blog? No worries. You can also comment on the post or on the Just.Be.Enough. Facebook page with your own story and be counted.

 

Filed Under: Be enough me, Better world, Happy things, Hello, Inspiration, Postpartum depression, Writing · Tagged With: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Suicide Prevention and Blue Hair

September 10, 2011 by ·

A few weeks ago Cristi and Lizz and I were tweeting about Cristi’s commitment to dye her hair completely blue if she raised $1,500 for suicide prevention. If she didn’t get there, she said, she’d get blue streaks.

Blue streaks? Hey, that’s #54 on my life list! Before I knew it, Lizz and I had agreed to get blue streaks if Cristi reached her goal. (Don’t tell her, but I’d have done it whether she reached her goal or not.) Several others jumped on the Smurf train and agreed to go blue as well.

Well, she got there. And then some. She worked really hard, with a dedication that was incredible to watch. I’m so proud of what she’s done – not only the fundraising but the awareness for such an important cause.

I have been touched by suicide and I know how devastating it is for those left behind.

I also know what it feels like to be so clouded by depression that not living anymore seems like the only option.

There are always options. No one is alone. It’s okay to ask for help. I learned that when I reached my lowest point and I’m so glad I didn’t stay silent.

Life list or not, I was totally prepared to add some blue to my ‘do.

So yesterday, in three different cities, Cristi and Lizz and I went blue.

getting hair cut

The blue's in. Time to get rid of the mullet.

blue streaks in my hair!

Why yes, I do have blue hair.

 

blue streaked hair

See? Blue!

 

We #bluebloggers tweeted during the process, and knowing that two friends – people I’ve been lucky enough to meet in person – were doing the same thing at the same time for a good cause was totally inspiring.

Cristi – who looks great with totally blue hair – vlogged about it. Please go and visit her and tell her she’s awesome.

Lizz looks pretty great in blue herself, and she has posted something really brave in revealing her new streaks. Please go and love on her.

Huge thanks to everyone who supported Cristi’s fundraising. I’ve seen you step up and I love you for it.

Sincere thanks also to Sarah Rae at Studio 1284 here in Victoria for not only doing my hair but being excited about it (and charging me less because it’s for charity).

And, of course, thank you to Cristi for speaking out to stop suicide. I love you, my soul sister.

***

I’m talking to YOU. #youarebeautiful #youareloved #youareNOTalone #StopSuicide

Filed Under: Better world, Happy things · Tagged With: , , , , , ,
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